Growing in Grace: Addie's First Beach Trip!!

I know I shared a few pictures in the last post from our beach trip, but since it was Addie's first ever beach trip and first non-hospital nights away from home, it definitely deserves its own post! Keep in mind this was also our first trip as parents, and our first trip as a couple to the South Carolina coast. To say it was dramatically different from planning to "relaxing" to traveling to and from is a massive understatement.

Here are some of the key differences:

First, our vacation destination required more thought. ..I'm OCD, superstitious, overly cautious (yes, I admit it. ..but it's well earned, so show me a little grace), and refuse to set us up for failure, so, we opted for Hilton Head Island, rather than the Gulf Coast that had been our destination of choice pre-Addie (PA). HHI has a very good hospital (our neurologist said so from first hand experience with patients there), and Savannah and its children's hospital (and a pediatric neurosurgeon) are a quick 45 minute drive away. Just in case, of course.

Second, the condo's proximity to the ocean and price came in a distant second to the cleanliness shown in the online photos and reviews mentioning how spotless the unit was. To further prove that point, we wound up renting two condos for our group of 9, and even though the unit we stayed in had air conditioning problems, we opted to stay in that one because the owner made extra efforts to ensure it was deep cleaned for Addie. We happened to stumble upon the cleaning supervisor as she did her last minute spot check, and she told me they even cleaned the floors with vinegar to really disinfect them for our girl. ..this mommy was THRILLED. No chance we were staying anywhere else, 90 degree rooms or not! They did fix the air conditioning, and then the unit was absolute perfection. You can't put a price (or a thermometer for that matter) on the peace of mind knowing that Addie could crawl freely on a floor that was as clean as I could have gotten it myself. It was a huge weight off my mind.. .it sounds crazy, but their extra effort really allowed me to enjoy our trip.

Third, instead of spending hours camped out on the beach or by the pool, I think we got a maximum of 1.5 hours in the sun on one of the days we were there. Addie and I have vampire skin, so that required extra caution, and the sand / chlorine / suntan lotion cocktail irritated Addie's face one day, and, honestly, her tube feeding and nap schedule was just too jumbled up to leave much outdoor time. I think we were just starting to figure it out when it was time to come home. Best case scenario, I think we could have maxed out at 2 hours total if everything fell into place. ..and it just didn't and that was ok! All of the work and effort to get to the beach, only to come back up 30 minutes later, was absolutely worth it to see Addie's fascination with the waves and commanding her grandparents back and forth to the ocean to bring her buckets of water to pour out on her beach towel. Oh, and she tried to wipe away the sand with one of her baby wipes. And when I say wipe away the sand, I don't mean the sand on her towel, I mean the sand under her towel. ..you know, the beach itself. I hated to break it to her, but no amount of Addie determination and cleaning OCD was going to make all of that sand go away. ..but it was absolutely precious to watch her furiously wiping away!

It really was a great trip. Our condos were gorgeous, Addie loved spending time with her grandparents and Uncle Aaron and Aunt Michelle every day, and there was something incredibly special about taking Addie back to the place I used to go to every year with my family. I have so many great memories on HHI over the years, and it was really neat revisiting some of those places with my daughter. Philip, Eddie, Aaron and my dad got in some good golf and tennis, Addie and I got in some (brief) naps and even slept in most days, and mom, Linda and Michelle got in lots of relaxing time on the beach or cooling off in the (other, more air conditioned) condo. I think my favorite part was the night we walked around the harbor at Shelter Cove, which is where my family used to stay when I wasn't much older than Addie is now. There weren't too many people out, the sun was just setting and casting amazing beams of light over the boats on the horizon, and Addie was incredibly cute in a smocked dress that the Roberts' girls were kind enough to pass on to her. It was a very "circle of life" moment coupled with salt air, a watercolor sky, great live music in the background, and a warm breeze. My heart was just so incredibly full and happy. I had forgotten how relaxing life is in the Low Country, with its Spanish moss and gentle breezes. ..and it was just what my soul needed.

Now, do not be fooled. ..I was totally overwhelmed at least once each day we were there, asking myself if I had lost my ever loving mind and good sense by even attempting a "vacation" and trip away from home with Addie at this point. ..Did I mention she had been sick for weeks leading up to this trip? And that they found "gunk" in her right lung days before we left? But her doctor gave us the "go" sign, and she even said the salt air may help (it did!), so we held our breath and decided to try it, antibiotics, albuterol inhaler and percussor in hand. We absolutely couldn't get all of our stuff in the back of our SUV and had to send some things with the other family members' cars. Before you tell me that's how it is with any toddler, keep in mind that in addition to the "normal" toddler stuff, we have to pack a suitcase just to carry the formula for her tube feedings and three different carry-on sized bags of medical supplies and medical records, organized by their increasing level of importance and a fourth bag with nothing but feeding tube supplies (and an extra Mic-Key button. ..and a back up to the extra Mic-Key button, just in case). Please know that I am NOT complaining. ..I'm being real. Several moms I know who have traveled with their children with different medical needs made it sound like no big deal to travel with them (several were also very honest!), and I do not in any way want any other moms who take this journey after I have to think they're crazy or failing by being overwhelmed (you will be!) or by packing as efficiently as possible and still requiring a UHaul for a 3 day trip to visit family across the state (entirely possible!). That being said, one of my proudest moments was the "beauty" of our loaded up car and the organization that went into packing each bag. I can honestly say that we didn't forget anything important, and I knew where everything was when we needed it. I was one happy OCD control freak!

It was more of a "work relocation" than a "vacation", but I will tell you what made the trip for me. On the second day, I was having my panicky, I can't believe we still have days left to be here, moments, just thinking about how much work goes into just two minutes of fun when I stopped to think. ..the harder you have to work for moments like these, the more precious the memories will be. Our first year with Addie brought me to my knees on more days than not, but I promise you that the happy moments from that year will never be overshadowed. It took nearly two years to see her take independent steps, but I guarantee that memory will be hard to top on my list of favorites. So, the beach was hard work this year, and it will be again next year and the next for a while. ..but the memories we made already overshadow the relaxing vacations of years gone by (not that I wouldn't like to try to relax like that again for just a minute. ..or maybe two. ..or read a book from cover to cover under a beach umbrella).

Perspective seems to be my word of the year right now, and I think that in having Addie the way we had her and spending the months and years doing what we do together now has allowed me a little more perspective than some. This vacation was more work than relaxation, but we have years and years ahead of us when we can relax, tan, and read books. Addie is only this young and this labor intensive (in a good way! totally worth it!) for a tiny window of time .. I have lived enough to know that in a few years, I will wish I could turn back time to these precious, hard fought moments with her experiencing the ocean, the sand, and the waves for the first time. So, even just a few weeks removed, the fears and overwhelmed feelings are fading, and what stands out is Addie's laughter, her huge grin when she saw her Uncle Aaron first thing in the morning over breakfast, and her precious little hand reaching down to touch the waves from the security of my arms. These truly are the best days. ..if only I could freeze time.