Spring Reunion

Addie's just taking it all in. ..

The stars lined up on Saturday (it actually DIDN'T rain, the weather was warm, and Addie actually took a nap!), and we were able to take our first fun trip out of the house as a family. We have been out together just 3 times before this, and all were either en route to a doctor's appointment or to and from the hospital with her shunt revision. This time, we were going out entirely by choice, which honestly freaks me out a little. I think it comes with the experience of my pregnancy and time in the NICU, but I'm almost afraid to venture out of our safe cocoon by choice, just for fun. It's like I'm tempting fate. I know that probably doesn't make a lot of sense to most of you, but it is something I honestly contend with when thinking of getting Addie out. You can reassure me that bad things won't happen just because we venture out to do "normal" things, but until you've lived in my shoes for 6.5 months of guilt, chaos, fear, and near death experiences, I'm afraid I only take your well intentioned words as, well, just that. ..well intentioned words. This is something unfortunately that I have to work through on my own. I'm learning that the more I'm pushed, the more I push back. I know that's also wrong, and reactions like that should have been left behind when I moved out of my teenage years, but that's just where I am at. I know it will get better, and I am totally ok with being patient with myself. ..I just ask that everyone else be patient, too, please. All of that being said, we had an amazing time, and I am SO glad we went!!

Addie was a little overwhelmed when things got a little bit noisy (by her standards, no one else'), but otherwise, she did amazingly well! She seemed to enjoy looking at and watching Harper (the birthday girl!!) and Milly, her NICU sisters. It was such a treat to see the other girls (and their mommies!!!!!). This was the first time they had all been together, ever, and it was the first time that Crystal, Jenny and I were all together without wearing our attractive hospital gowns. Everyone looked so good in "real" clothes! I can't tell you how nice it was to have our little NICU family back together. ..we didn't get to talk nearly long enough because we had to get back to the house to feed Addie, but I was so glad to see that our bond was still intact. I am so proud of all three girls that I could explode. To see Harper and Milly crawling, entranced with each other and playing, and to see Addie curiously watching them, trying to figure out who these other little people must be. ..it was enough to melt my heart. They have all come so incredibly far. The time flew by, and we actually stayed almost 30 minutes longer than we needed to in order to feed Addie on time. I felt so. ..free. I won't say "normal" because I'm not sure what that really is anymore, but it felt like I was taking a giant sigh of relief. We made it. We made it to spring, and we made it safely back to our first reunion with all three girls doing amazingly well.

I loved seeing Harper and Milly.. .I remember when Harper joined the 2 Pound Club not long after we moved in across the aisle from her. I didn't even know her or her parents yet, but I remember thinking that was a great goal for Addie. Two pounds. If that sweet little girl could do it, maybe, just maybe, we could, too. Now I'm cheering Addie on again after seeing Harper. Harper is crawling and sitting like she was born doing it. I know Addie will do that too, all in her own time. She's just not quite there yet. Milly is like the big sister to both girls. She looks so good! She has two teeth!! She is also sitting and crawling and eating like a champ. Things don't always come easy for Milly, either. She has overcome so incredibly much in her life. She, like Harper and Addie, is a living, breathing, beautiful miracle. I am so incredibly proud of all three girls. They have amazing parents that I truly admire; we've all had to work so hard to get to this point, to help our girls grow and develop. I'm so glad that God chose to bring these beautiful people into our life, and it only seems fitting that our first real time out of the house be spent with them.

Love these girls!!